timetravlr

HI! Im traveling into the future. Im going to offer reviews of what I find and hints for other time travelers....

Thursday, June 28, 2007

2038 pic nic land!


Wow, just got back from 2038. It seems as though the summer brings everybody out for pic nics all the time. Actually, I think they had them in fall too, and winter. Well, the ants and the people sure seems happy.

By the way I was told I have a huge appetite for a ghost. So apparently my feeling my body was some how not there was right. A first hint was that I never farted, ever. Thats just not natural, thats supernatural (Que theramin music).

Friday, June 22, 2007

Eddie Grant


Do you remember that song Electric Avenue? I do. The funny thing is that it makes me feel like I should be making some revolutionary change. And I feel bad that I'm not.
I envision the new wave generation hearing this song, raising our hands in solidarity and blocking traffic in and out of a munitions factory. I see us singing this song in unison and opening CO-Ops and natural food communities. Free food for all ! Solar Powered concerts in the park!

So what the heck happened? Perhaps we needed more detailed instructions. Perhaps an album with a paperback book on liberation. Soul Force revolution! That's what we need!

Hmm, Maybe he lost his momentum by doing that silly song for the Romancing the Stone movie. Perhaps it was bad for the revolution. Then Montgomery Wards used Electric Avenue for a promotion of their electronics Department. Eddie Grant went on to record a great song about apartheid and hope and Johannesburg, but by then Public Enemy had become the voice of revolution.

So, If you see me marching down the street sing electric avenue, please stop and join me and the world will live as one. Ooops, different song.

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Monday, June 11, 2007

the truth about Journey and Organized crime

Journey has always been a front for organized crime. As paid tribute in Last nights final episode of the Sopranos, Journey has always been about laundering money from organized crime. Racketeering, embezzlement, Drug trafficking, Arson, Extortion, Murder, no crime was too vile for Neil Shohn and his henchmen. The Music? All calculated and measured out carefully by satanic engineers who wanted to make something so which seemed innocent and yet was so banal and syrupy that it could be used by evil forces at their will. Newsflash! Every time there was a Journey concert in a US city a Semi filled with crack arrived at either the CIA headquarters or the GOP front office. It would then be filled with abducted teens to be sold in far off lands. These teens were then forced to make arms for other operations all over the globe. How do I know this? Lets just say that I was one of the lucky ones and leave it at that. Don't stop believing indeed.

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Friday, June 08, 2007

Snobbery pays, just ask the elite

Want to make money, gain power and influence? Become an expert at something that appeals to peoples need to feel superior. Just about anyone can brew coffee. But how many of us can claim to brew coffee made from Blue Mountain Jamacian beans? Thats what is most in demand in Japan, never mind that Hawaiian coffee beans are closer and also superior. Those go to Europe, insuring that cofee beans travel the furthest distance possible to reach their oh so "in" consumer.

Becoming too good for the regular crowd beats trying to please everybody hands down. The most sucessful snobbery scheme is Starbucks, which offers only the best for its loyal junkies, err customers. Which is funny because they went from the incredibly snobby practice of only selling beans (at the first five stores) to selling coffee slurpies in pretty cups. Besides, like any self respecting drug dealer they have gotten into producing movies and albums.

I can look back and see what a snob I have been in my life. I thought the band Low was soo great and would talk about them with only the most sensative well informed music lovers, who were considered indie (for independent of course) rockers. These people are so great at talking about music. Unfortunately they are also so great at standing with their arms crossed looking at a band play as if they were studying for a mid term. Perhaps they were, and if they failed to take close notes they would be forced into exile from their indie rock counterparts. This exile land? perhaps a stadium show, perhaps listening to KBCO and finding oneself singing along, NON IRONICLY! The horror.

There are so many degrees of eliteism it boggles the mind. Or ast least the mind of a failed snob like myself. From PHD degrees to extensive knowledge of a really good rare beer to an expensive vehicle that sets you apart from the other common folk waiting at the red light, there are thousands of ways to say "I have a star on my belly, so get off my beach, You common sneech!"

So whats wrong with being an expert? Having the most unique sense of style and getting the most from life? Whats wrong with zigging while all the morrons are zagging and zagging while all the riff raff are zigging? Nothing I suppose.

But whats bigger than all these little details? Life is. If you read a little Joseph Campbell you are introduced to the hero's journey. To sum it up in my own words, That journey is to move outside your comfort zone, outside your self and bring something back to your community. Its not a popular idea in our age, when the notion that each one of us is the center of the universe and everthing should go our way and we shuold never be incovenienced. But thats it. Just to go out and sacrifice a bit and help others. SO, if you can do this, Like promethius bringing fire, George Harrison bringing eastern thought, My cool neighbor bringing me corn, bring something without being smug or self serving or important and bringing good to others just for the sake of good, CONGADULATIONS! You are enlightened! You are my hreo, which by the way, is a very select group.

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Tuesday, June 05, 2007

ten things Ill never be too cool for !

1 CTW! Keep making Sesame Street guys! And I love the DOUBLE ENTENDRES on Telly Tubbies!
2 street musicians
3 hugs
4 chocolate
5 sing alongs
6 Mini Comics
7 7-11 nachos (their resemblance to actual food is amazing!)
8 a nice walk
9 a nice smile
10 warm fuzzzies.
Why did I limit my list to ten? What about Spongebob squarepants and Burl Ives? Haloween? Candy and field corn...ahh... life is grand!

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10 things to cool for me.

1 my hair, I dont know where its going but its not coming back
2 Those 20 something kids on fixed gear bikes
3 Electronica musicians, who have asked me to quit coming and yelling"IS THAT FREEDOM ROCK?" they do not even rember the ad
4Ipods. Untill my Sony walkman dies see if I care, Apple
5. Europe. Though they might like me in Scotland, The EU has issued a statement saying not to bother trying to explain Euni` to me. Right back atcha France.
6. nightclubs. even when I was young they would roll their eyes when I came in. So I dance like A crazy puppet. Well screw you because I have a strobe light and plenty of Ktel records at home.
7. Wax Trax. but they are nice enough to be nice. Thanks Guys!
8. Hi tech snob racers, Kayakers, and outdoorsy types. Guess what? IF spending money makes you fast why am I passing you?
9. Birds of prey. They are too cool for everyone!
10. Stephen Carey. He is to cool and smart for everyone, but at least has the decency to tell them to their face. Congradulations on turning snobbery into a career Stephen!

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10 things im too cool for

1 Bahaus, but thanks for being so pretentious and bad that exposure to your awful music lead me to REAGGAE!
2 American Idol. Im way to cool to watch that show.Or try out for it.
3. Music sponsored by beer makers. Unless Fat tire/New Belgium sponsors a Cd. I trust those guys.
4. Spiderman. The really cool like Aqua man.
5. Aqua Man. See how pompus I can be?
6. Mainstream News. They report on Paris Hilton while our nation is at war.
7.Paris Hilton, and any celebrity at all. Unless they raise money for something I care about.
8. A Mini. Unless it was an old Mini from England, but then where the hell would I get parts? Just get a honda Fit and get on with your life.
9. Feeling like I have to compleet some top ten list

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Happy Cindy Sheehan DAY!


Happy Cindy Sheehan day from 2038. This is a day that commemorates Cindy quiting her non woking stratagey in 2007 and focusing on what she and all her friends and their positive energy could do. They realized thay had met critical mass with their Camp Casey campaign and that if the government was so intent on ignoring the will of the people, the people must find ways to make the government responsive.

this post is late , Cindy Day was May 30th. But be hasppy and demand justice all the same.

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