Transcripts from Ward Churhill hearing

Hank Brown: "So, mister dirty filthy hippie riot instigator, you think you have some kind of right to say what you think?"

Ward Churchill: "you mean like my constitutional rights to freedom of speech?"

Hank Brown: "Yeah like that! Well let me set you straight, the GOP has gotten rid of that crap, along with anything that stops the corporations from total domination of planet earth, Muh hahaha!"

Ward Churchill: " I must admit I am a little stunned by your candor. Your transparency is appreciated, and even I am a little shocked. But FU! I am not going anywhere. My lawyers are going to fight this injustice every step of the way. The people will not stand for this!"

Brown: "The people? HAHAHAHAHHA< thats rich! the only people who would stand up for you are so marginalized that they are ignored by anybody with any power. The only people who would give a crap about your academic freedom are working on keeping themselves out of GITMO! The rest of the nation is getting a frontal lobotomy from a big screened tv they paid for! Muh hahaha!

Churchill: "When this gets out to the media..."

Brown: "When this get to our allies at the media the headlines will read "WARD CHURCHILL DEMANDS RIGHT TO KILL REMAINING 911 ATTACK SURVIVORS" The independent media will be to busy covering bigger scandals! Muh hahaha!"

Churchill : "ow, what the hell.... (faints from dart shot into neck from young republican)

Brown: "TO Arms young republicans!Join us as we cleanse Boulder forever. The 90s are over, along with any decade or movement giving resistance to our domination! CU will forever stand for football and academic yes men! We will graduate the finest bunch of WASP MBA's ever! All wealth will flow to the top of the pyramid, from which we shall do as we please!!!"

And on that note the meeting was adjourned, the young republicans joined Brown as they marched through Boulder, spraying hippies with bleach water, forcing vagrants on buses to other communities and trampling public gardens. And of course, welding public drinking fountains shut so that sales of bottled water would go up. Ward Churchill's unfortunate accident was planned. Plane wreck.